In Shirky’s situation, I have no idea why he would so easily submit to what the student wants. I would think he’d take his name a little bit more seriously than that.

A penchant for risk-taking has its advantages, but humility should definitely have a place in our society.

I don’t think it’s genetic. I think that it’s perhaps somehow tied up in the traditional gender role of male as provider and female as the provided for, and the caretaker of the home.

As a man/husband/father and the primary provider in my home, I do feel very strong pressure to do whatever it takes to provide for my family in the best way possible, even if that has, on occasion, meant stretching my personal ethical boundaries (true confession). My wife doesn’t feel that. Yes, she works too, but she knows she’s always going to be cared for — by me, by her brother, by her father. She doesn’t feel the “survival” pressure in the same way I do.

Also, I think the traditional gender roles encourage optimism more among men and realism (not pessimism) among women. A hunter has to be an optimist. He goes out every day with the assumption that he’s going to make a kill. If he can’t do that, he won’t be a successful hunter. The woman, on the other hand, has to assume that the man might NOT make a kill, and allocate resources accordingly to ensure the survival of the family and the tribe.

How does optimism vs. realism come into play? I think that’s a major part of that willingness to exaggerate one’s own capabilities. I have a strong belief — based on previous experience — that if I can get “in”, I can do the job. I’m reluctant to let someone else’s hang-up about, say, me having X years of experience with this or that, or seeing me as more “marketing” than “technical” get in the way of that.

I’m not trying to justify the behavior, just to understand it a little better. We certainly have in so many ways moved on beyond our prehistoric gender roles, but there are vestigial remnants too. Perhaps by acknowledging them, we can more easily move beyond them.

Also, I think he fails to see that if we act this way, we tend to fall under a lot more scrutiny than men do. My only recourse ends up being “whisper your idea in a guy’s ear and then he’ll shamelessly promote it”. It makes me sad.

I can’t say I know what the answer is. I do think it is something women need to address in a civil manner though.

How about let’s do it another way, hmmm? Because I’m going to figure out how to do it my way eventually, and then you can bet I’ll take my ball and leave if I don’t like your game.

I’ll take my ball to another field and start a better game.

Let’s deal, guys.

Thanks for your thoughts, Michelle!
.-= Sheila Scarborough´s last blog ..Ideas for a travel and tourism Web site overhaul =-.